Ok. I did it. I purchased my first pair of skinny jeans, a feat which I never imagined I'd undertake. You see, I don't have the best relationship with my body. At 5'10" and 130 lbs, I'm just a little slip of a thing, and I've never liked being skinny. I've avoided any sort of clothing that accentuates my slim and slender frame; in fact, I usually have worn quite a few layers, just to feel like I look a little bulkier than I am. Or, I'd buy everything a size too big and end up getting lost in fabric.Those tricks never worked, though: I usually looked like I just didn't know how to wear clothes.I've worn my new jeans a few times since buying them, and I've received quite a few compliments, which has helped me feel more comfortable about wearing such ass-hugging pants. Enter my dear, delightful mother.
"I thought you didn't like skinny jeans," she commented yesterday.
"Well, Mom," I answered, "I'm trying them out. A lot of people have said I look great in them."
She frowned as she walked toward the laundry room with a bag of clothes, "But they make you look so...skinny."
I was upset by her disapproval, but didn't want to argue with her. I have, however, thought quite a lot about why I was angered by her comment. I think it boils down to the fact that I'm coming to terms with the fact that, hey, I am skinny. I've become more comfortable with my body. I'm buying clothes that fit well, rather than buying things a size bigger and baggier so I can feel less little. I feel like I look good, and other people are noticing. I guess I wanted my mom to see the way I wore the skinny jeans -- with confidence and style -- rather than seeing that they were only skinny.
I know my mom wasn't attacking me, but I'm kind of glad I got defensive about how I'm dressing myself. That flare of whatever it was shows me that I really believe there's nothing wrong with my small frame. That I'm taking pride in myself. That I can -- and sometimes honestly do -- see myself as an articulate, successful and (yes, even this appealing adjective) an attractive young man.
2 comments:
Oh, my darling Nic, I was so glad to read of your skinny jeans, especially due to this new discovery: you're wonderful in every way. :-) Plus the skinny jeans have found your tush, for years I didn't believe you had one.
love! so, you definitely need to be comfortable with your body. it is yours and only yours. and frankly, its nobody else's business what you wear. so love it! embrace it! and ignore your poor mother. (my mom keeps telling me i'm fat. so... we listen, accept that they feel that way, ignore the criticism, and just love them anyway. right? i mean, its all we can do.) i can't wait to see your skinny jeans.
p.s. i ended up throwing mine away. cause even after 5 washes they still smelled terrible. ugh!
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